Went to give give my deposit to Frick's driving school and schedule my class for a week from Monday. I ought to be excited, but after twenty-seven years of not having an automobile I'm more ticked off about having to sit through a two week crash (no pun intended) course. I ought to be excited and I would be excited if this didn't mean two weeks straight of hopping public transit early in the morning and yawning through the number 7 and the number 15 A Route.

My mother says something stupid to poison my whole day. I love her like a best friend, but when she says stupid things I want to scream and usually her breath is bad when she says them. For a week now whenever she opens her mouth I'll think, "You stupid (insert expletive here)" And she knows when she's about to say something that will just piss me off, but there she goes again.

That's in my head too. At night, when you're tired every bad thing is in your head. Every good thing seems like an imposition. There remains, no matter how much you've done, a list of impossilbe tasks that follow.

And then comes sleep. Sleep and night work a marvelous change. That which could not be understood becomes clear, the obstacle you could not find a way through, suddenly unblocks, the fusty air in the room is cooled by the breeze in the window. You awake and the world seems to awake too. New with you. I will close my eyes and wait for that miracle.